AND COUNTING

Each January 8th since 1951, I have a birthday. I'm grateful for each one. Today I've celebrated with My Amazing Missus--just the two of us. We went to one of our favorite burger places, got our food by curbside delivery and ate in the truck. For dessert, we went through the drive-thru at Andy's Frozen Custard. I had a Tin Roof Sundae and she had a kid's size strawberry sundae.

Then we drove to a community where we spent our early married years together and the place I had birthdays 24-40. I guess this is what birthdays are like at this age and in this age: a slow drive and remembering with the one you share it all with.

Numerous friends and family have texted, called and posted on Facebook with happy wishes. It worked. It has been a wonderful day.

"Do you remember what we did on your birthday last year?" My Amazing Missus asked. I didn't. She reminded me that we went to the funeral home to collect the remains of my mom who had passed a few weeks before. Covid 19.

It's hard in a way and essential to remember your mom on your birthday; even your 71st; even if she's no longer here. But, she was quite a celebrator and wouldn't want this to turn dark.

I'm not big on those over sweet cherries that are dropped on top of a good sundae. So today, I gave the one on my Tin Roof from Andy's to My Amazing Missus, who loves them. I am however, a big fan of the metaphorical cherry-on-top. You know the ones that are that extra special something. Mine was a phone call from our kids and hearing the grandkids say, "Happy Birthday Pops!"

I MADE IT

ALTHOUGH SOME WARNED I MIGHT NOT. I’ve made it through 69 years. That’s the way it works you know. You don’t get to have a First birthday party until you’ve lived a year. Then you start on year two. So, now I’ve embarked on year 70. I was thinking that sounded incredibly old, but my mother who is 90-something just called to say, “Happy Birthday” and asked me if this was 87 or 88 for me. Good grief mom, what were your early teens like?

I can remember voices from my past like that of my high school geometry teacher telling me I would regret not taking his geometry class more seriously. He was wrong. One thing I did take seriously in school was learning to diagram sentences. I do regret that. I’ve never even once been asked as an adult to diagram a sentence. What a waste. Not really. I’ve always enjoyed words, sentences and drawing lines.

There are some regrets obviously, but none are too crippling. Some I wish I could fix, but I know from Marty McFly how dangerous time travel can be. My bro-in-law and one of my very best friends talks about making amends. I don’t really know how to do that effectively. But it is my desire to.

I heard a man who was in the final hours of a terminal disease say, “I wish I could live my life over again, not because I haven’t enjoyed it but because I have enjoyed it so much.”

Do morbidness and the golden years go hand in hand?

Well even though my physical form has made it through 69 relatively unscathed, I’m still as immature mentally, socially and spiritually as I was in my prime. So life goes on with plenty to aspire to.

“I’m sick of following my dreams. I’m just going to ask them where they’re going, and hook up with them later. ”

— Mitch Hedberg

Someone told me, “Don’t give unsolicited advice. People hate it when old people give unsolicited advice!”

I didn’t ask them for that advice so I’m not going to take it. It doesn’t matter to me whether anyone takes my advice or not. Sometimes I feel like they’re not even listening.

For example, in every episode of Dateline, 20/20, 48-hours and all the rest I yell at those idiots on TV, “if you’re going to kill your wife don’t go to Wal Mart or Home Depot and buy a shovel, a blue tarp, a roll of duct tape and clorox with your credit card.” But still they do it…every single time.

I don’t know how many times I’ve given Billy Donovan coaching advice though the TV; it’s like he can’t even hear me.

Even my Grand-Kids—I offer wisdom and guidance and they give me this little, cute eye-roll, and an, “O Pops.”

Well by golly I’ve reached the point where I can give all the advice I want and the right to ignore any and all advice from others, especially doctors and religious leaders. Just kidding Mom. I’m only 69, and I’m just kidding.

Here’s some advice for you: laugh hard everyday, don’t trust politicians and wear sunscreen.

I’ve been to plenty of kids’ birthday parties over the past few years. These days they have “themes” or destinations like beautiful indoor swimming pools for November swim parties or places like that one with the big mouse, games and bad pizza. I’ve been to rainbow parties, unicorn parties, Minnie Mouse parties. These are so common, one of the grand-girls was a bit indignant when I told her I wasn’t having a party much less a theme.

So that set me to thinking… If I did have a party and a theme what would it be? I decided on this:

Pops & Popeye

Happy Birthday Elvis. I can’t believe you would have been 80; it seems like only yesterday.

Normally I don’t dish out birthday wishes to celebrities here at About Pops. But I do normally talk about myself and getting older.

“Then,” you might say, “you must be a big fan of Elvis and his music.”

No, not really. I looked at my iTunes library. I have one Elvis recording, Here Comes Santa Claus. That was a song on a Christmas album I bought.

You see, the deal is, Elvis and I share a birthday; today, January 8.

[cue up The Beatles, "When I'm 64"]

I talked to my Mom and Dad last night. (We senior adults call and check on one another when it’s bitter cold outside.) They were recalling the night of my birth. Apparently, I just barely made it on the 8th. A few more hours and I would be saying, “Happy Birthday” to Kate Middleton, Richard Nixon, Jimmie Page and Dave Matthews. Now there’s a couple of guys whose music I have lots of.

No complaints though. The King and I share the 8th with some pretty cool people and at least one nut-job. I’ll let you guess which one (or more): Stephen Hawking, R. Kelly, Noah Cyrus, Kim Jong-un, and Soupy Sales, just to name a few.

Birthdays are one of those contemplative days for me. You know—looking back and thinking about the days ahead. As happens, well-meaning people, and people selling books, tend to offer insight on days like this. This is from the WWW:

Capricorns born on January 8 seek to balance worldly concerns with an expression of their soul-needs. Although they strive for a pragmatic approach to life, they have a superstitious nature. They are gifted yet may be riddled with self-doubts. These problems are exacerbated by the fact that they have difficulty expressing their feelings through words.

Friends and Lovers
Because of their basic distrust of others' motives, it is hard for January 8 people to make friends. If trust is breached, the friendship is likely to end. They have a powerful love nature. They are romantics who demand total devotion. Even if they are not especially attractive they can cast a spell, drawing lovers to them with ease.

Children and Family
Even when they do not feel bound to family members, people born on January 8 are generous to them. They may have had a strict upbringing from which they lapsed in adulthood, creating guilt and dishonor. They make doting parents, anxious to give their children material as well as spiritual riches.

It’s like someone’s been reading my journals. I’m tempted to click the link and spend “$19.95 for the full report”.

On second thought: for what?! At 64, when it comes to stuff intended to make me more self-enlightened, I’m with Popeye, “I yam what I yam and that’s all that I yam.”

The Kings & I

THE KINGS ARE DEAD AND I DON'T FEEL TOO HOT MYSELF. (Thank you Lewis Grizzard).

Now, I don't claim to be Royalty--although "Sir Pops" has a nice royal/commoner ring to it. If only I could get word to the Queen.

I don't claim to be Royalty--although I really, really like that hot little pop song by Lorde called "Royals". Here are the lyrics to the catchy chorus. The song sort of hints that we can self-define royalty. So maybe I can be a Royal.

And we'll never be royals (royals).
It don't run in our blood,
That kind of luxe just ain't for us.
We crave a different kind of buzz.
Let me be your ruler (ruler),
You can call me queen Bee
And baby I'll rule, I'll rule, I'll rule, I'll rule.
Let me live that fantasy.

You can check out the music video of Royals here.

Even with that, I still don't claim to be Royalty, however I do have a lot in common with two guys that are arguably among the most well known and loved Kings: King David and Elvis.

Notice they both have great hair and that cool little lip curl deal. I don't.

Quickly, let me say to my more fundamentalist friends: no, I am not comparing myself to a beloved Biblical stalwart. It may seem like that, but I'm not. Really. By the way, did you know that the name "David" means beloved? Just saying.

Starting with age before beauty, let's look at King David. Although I am known by two of the most important people in the world as "Pops", to many others I'm known by my given name: David. So he and I have that in common.

I think I may also share his propensity for being very well-intentioned but occasionally weak and narcissistic. Well--at least I'm that way. For example, I don't know for sure what I would have done if I had been king and noticed a babe like Bathsheba bathing on the roof of the house next door. But I'm not going to sit here like some kind of pompous, royal arse and pretend like I'm stronger than him.

We probably could all guess what Elvis would have done in a similar situation. He would have put a little extra Brylcream (because a little dab'l do ya) on the pompadour, grabbed his guitar and lured her over with some hip action and a siren song.

Detour: Speaking of the patented Elvis hip action. I'm confident if the boy had lived into his senior years, he most certainly would have been looking at at least one hip replacement.

So, how about Elvis? What similarity could I possibly claim to this renowned king? January 8. That's right. Elvis and I share a birthday.

Back in my first coming of age, I was not a fan of Elvis and his music--at all. Oh, I appreciated his breaking of rock and roll ground. But my tastes were more to acts like The Beatles, The Kinks, The Yardbirds, The Animals, The Rolling Stones, etc.

Unfortunately, back in the day when I listened to pop/rock radio, I had to spend every birthday listening to Elvis music, because it was his birthday too, and after all; he was The King.

Now, in my second-coming of age, I enjoy hearing a good Elvis standard or two. I now realize how important he was to the shift in musical culture. As was King David. That's right. David was a musician himself. And hey, so am I!

We know for sure David played the harp. He played for that nutty King Saul and chased his haunting spirits away. David also apparently organized the very first band--don't believe me?--It's in the Bible. (1 Chronicles 25) I wonder if they practiced in the garage of the royal chariot.

Sadly, we can't draw many lessons about living our second-coming of age from Elvis. He died 1n 1977 at the age of 42. I have learned this though:

"Wise men say, only fools rush in..."

King David, on the other hand, lived to be around 70ish. I did a bit of biblical research to see how he did in his old age and came up with this: 

When King David was old and well advanced in years, he could not keep warm even when they put covers over him.  So his servants said to him, “Let us look for a young virgin to attend the king and take care of him. She can lie beside him so that our lord the king may keep warm.” 1 Kings 1:1-2

Wow. There's a concept for a "senior living center". I can see the TV ad now... and in the background Elvis is singing: "Are you lonesome tonight."

Here's my birthday conclusion: no matter how royal we may think we are, sometimes we ain't nothin' but hounddogs.

Happy Birthday Elvis--wherever you are.