THE GLUE

I DON’T KNOW THESE WOMEN; and yet, I do. I know them well. I was literally raised in church; enrolled in the “Cradle Roll Department” of the Brookside Baptist Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma, at just a few weeks of age. This picture was posted on Facebook by my friend Phillip Mitchell along with this comment: “These ladies were the glue that held the Ada Church of God In Christ together! Much love to them for all the prayers they sent up for us!”.

I say we are friends but I’ve yet to met Phillip face to face. I know him only by his work, his calling and his obvious commitment to youth and the arts—two of my highest priorities. And in this passion, he and I are kindred spirits.

I have been in many, many churches in my life and in every one of those churches, if it still has a heartbeat, there is a core of women who are THE GLUE. They hold it together through the “prayers they send up for us”, through their discipline, their discipleship and their determination.

My Dad was a Baptist pastor for most of my life. His mother, his wife and his sister, Betty were church glue too. Sometime back, Baptist leadership (men) decided it was time to proclaim a twisted version of the Bible that somehow made the role of women as subservient to men. This took on varying degress of craziness and application. It was an exercise in blindness as far as I could tell. Let me give you an example of what I mean.

One day, not to many years ago, my Aunt Betty Brady was visiting my parents home. We were there too. We were all crowded in the kitchen while the meal was being prepared. Something was said about trends in the Baptist church and the role of women. My Dad made a comment about how he could see where the view came from with a strict reading of Paul’s letters. I don’t remember his exact words, but I remember my Aunt Betty’s: “Oh, Brother, you know better than that!” And he did too. I never remember my Dad, after that day, commenting on the role of women except to maybe acknowledge that: “There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Galations 3:28.

Glue indeed! It seems like we’re geared to think of the pastor’s sermon on Sunday morning as being the pinnacle of the church’s being. Try sustaining a church that only had that. Even Billy Graham needed a choir. If you look deeply into the life of a church you’ll find music, fellowship—being together usually around the table, you’ll find Vacation Bible School, Sunday School, ministries to the shut-in, the poor, the grieving—meals taken to the home, funeral dinners, and just being present. Where would all of that be without the Glue?

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that the only thing men are good for is changing the oil on the church bus. Sometimes I think it would be easier to pick new carpet for the sanctuary if the women weren’t in that business meeting, but I would hate to see that carpet.

I’m just saying: Phillip’s post helped me to remember the wonderful, beautiful women who have served and given and prayed, not for notoriety or a title, but because they seemed called to do it somehow. They seemed to understand the need for Glue. Now, more than ever.

Thank you to all of those women and to the women of the Ada Church of God in Christ. Please send up some prayers for us all.

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P.S.: I asked Phillip’s permission to share this. I wanted you to see his reply because it is rich with truth.

Dave,

Thank you for your very kind words of reassurance and your well wishes for our family. We are indeed well and offer our best wishes to you and yours as well.

One of the reasons that young people of today suffer…is because they don’t have the support system that you and I had. What is a support system? It’s the Glue!

The ladies that you see in that picture never hesitated to open the door to anyone who knocked. Many of them were single women, but you could still count on them to open their door, and extend their love to anyone they encountered. The men too in our neighborhood, never hesitated to show somebody else’s kid how to comb his hair, tie a tie, change his oil, or fix his lawn mower.

This is where I learned the importance of being a godmother or a godfather to kids who are not your own. On February 22nd at the Oklahoma history center, through the organization that you helped to start, P’Light Society Jazz Inc., I had the opportunity to present community awards to several individuals who have shown this magnificent trait!

I would like to send you more information and pictures as well as video of that incredible day. You certainly have our blessings on sharing the pictures from our humble beginnings!

Have a spectacular day my friend!

PMM

Girl Power

You go Pope Francis! Normally I wouldn't pontificate so casually regarding the Pontiff, but this One seems to be inviting us to be more real and familiar.

I liked so much of what he is reported to have said in his recent interview. Particularly this, speaking of the social issues that the church obsesses over: 

The dogmatic and moral teachings of the church are not all equivalent. The church’s pastoral ministry cannot be obsessed with the transmission of a disjointed multitude of doctrines to be imposed insistently ...

We have to find a new balance; otherwise even the moral edifice of the church is likely to fall like a house of cards, losing the freshness and fragrance of the Gospel. The proposal of the Gospel must be more simple, profound, radiant. It is from this proposition that the moral consequences then flow.

How about the role of women? When asked about this, he sounded pretty much like all male authority figures in the church:

I am wary of a solution that can be reduced to a kind of “female machismo,” because a woman has a different makeup than a man. But what I hear about the role of women is often inspired by an ideology of machismo. Women are asking deep questions that must be addressed.

Let me say clearly, I don't understand an "ideology of machismo." Apparently it is much clearer in Latin cultures and this Pope would know much more about that than I ever could.

So I will write what I do know. For many years I had a role in ministry to young people, mainly adolescents. All of this was within the Southern Baptist Convention. I am so sad to say that the most conservative of this denomination still hold to a narrow view of the role of women in the church and, unfortunately, beyond the church walls too. I am very happy to say that I've been blessed to know many, many women who identified with Baptists who were strong, effective leaders despite the rhetoric and ranting of church fathers. All of the dogma on the matter comes from a few verses in the letters of the Apostle Paul. I don't know of anything in the words or life of Jesus that would lead anyone to the conclusions the church has drawn on the matter.

Judy, Jane, Paula, Brooke, Jessica are just a few of the young women I've known who believed they had a calling to serve the church. It broke my heart to know of the hurdles, roadblocks and discouragement they would face if they pursued this calling in a Baptist church.

Again the good news is, as I've already said, many women have just forged on anyway: my Mom, my Aunt Betty, my Mother-In-Law Betty, my Daughter-In-Law Kara and my own Amazing Missus Arlene.

Yes that's my youngest grand girl, Harper, in the cape pictured above. I hope she  always believes she has super powers. Her cape is just as significant to me as the priestly garments of the Pope himself.

You go Harper and Karlee and young girls everywhere.