Fashion For Old Guys

SOMETIMES I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH AGE-APPROPRIATENESS. I HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE.

It’s hard being age-appropriate, you know? It’s a moving target. It’s hard in every area of life. But, it’s easy when you’re young. As a kid you go to an amusement park, there’s no wondering if a roller-coaster is age appropriate, there’s a cartoon character sign with his hand raised saying, “You must be this tall to ride this ride!” Everything from toys, to puzzles, to Pampers, to food is labeled for age-appropriateness.

Even the movies tell you if you need “PG” Parental-Guidance, or whether it is “R” rated, which basically means, “If your parents are too stupid to tell you you can’t see this movie, we will.” It may be time for a reworking of the movie rating system. I’m recommending a couple of new ratings: SA and CCR, which means if you’re a Senior Adult or a Conservative Christian Republican, you might want to pass on this one. Even for me, sometimes, today’s movies shock my sensibilities, and my standards are pretty low. I’m not a fan of graphic violence, super-hero-special-effects, and casual f-bombing for f-bombing’s sake, or movies starring Matthew McConaughey (It’s not personal, Matt).

For today’s post, I want to focus on one area of tricky age-appropriateness: How To Dress.

I believe I mentioned that I have a good excuse for struggling in this area; besides the fact that I’m an aging, softish, white guy, and we all struggle with this (or we just don’t care anymore). While I was still in my own adolescence/teen years/first coming-of-age, I started working with teens, first, at a junior high school in a counseling program as practicum for a college course. From there, I started in “youth ministry”—working with teens in a church setting. I continued that into my 50s and my second-coming-of-age.

So if we were to meet, and if I were to do something age-inappropriate, keep in mind, it’s not that I’m necessarily emotionally immature, just generationally confused. To this day I am much more comfortable hanging out with young people than I am with people my own age. I’m sure retired high school teachers and coaches can relate (unless you hated kids, which seems to be the case for a few teachers and coaches).

All of this contemplating age-appropriateness started when a sweetheart of a girl from the old youth group days sent me a link to an article about a reinvention of the famous and enduring Chuck Taylor Converse All-Star sneakers. She said something to the effect of: “I could see you wearing these.” I replied something like: “Heck yes! I need a pair.”

But then it dawned on me, should I be wearing Chucks, or is it time for the Rockports and Hush Puppies?

And, not just shoes. What about sock color, or socks at all? Should any man past puberty wear a tank top in public or anywhere other than a basketball court, regardless of physique, or one’s personal, unrealistic view of one’s own?

At this point in my life, only a couple of wardrobe issues are settled for me: boxers over briefs, and this: I just don’t feel comfortable in polo shirts. I do have one. I wear it to this place where I play my semi-annual golf game. They require it. That’s a problem because a lot of the old guys I know that look pretty dapper most of the time seem to do the polo shirt thing so well, most of the year. Somehow when I put on a polo and khakis, I feel like I should be selling TVs at Best Buy.

For many years I have been at my most comfortable in blue jeans, a long-sleeved shirt (sleeves rolled up) and loafers (no socks) in spring, summer and early-autumn. Once the frost is on the pumpkin, the sleeves roll down or I pull over a sweater and switch to socks and chuka boots. Why I’m worrying about clothes choice is beyond me. Why our obsessions?

I guess I still care to the point that I don’t want to look like an old-guy cliche. You know; hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts, sandals with socks. Here’s the thing, a lot of guys pull that off very well. It’s like they are so comfortable in their own skin that whatever they wear on that skin seems very authentic.

I also don’t want to appear to be struggling to hang on to some desperate sense of youthfullness. It’s not my fault that chuka boots have come back in to style (I think). I’m not some metrosexual wannabe.

Mostly though, I don’t want to embarrass my grand-girls. When I get home from a fun day out with them, and I look in the mirror and see that on my t-shirt that reads: “Medicare: Bring It On”, is a stain from the yogurt we had at Orange Leaf, and a smudge of grease from the pizza we had at Chuck E. Cheese, will I be embarrassed or will all that just be reminders of a wonder-full day?

At least my feet won’t hurt, because the new Converse Chuck Taylor All-Stars I’ve been wearing have extra cusioning and arch  support. Thank you Paula Moore Gresham for the tip and for believing I can pull it off.

So, to all you grandkids and wives out there: any advice for us old guys? Keep this in mind: one thing I know for sure, I don’t want to look like one of those guys whose wife laid his clothes out for him.

Espresso, Oyster or Salsa

IN A FEW WEEKS, it will be two years since I went public here at About Pops with our dream to take to the open road in a shiny Airstream travel trailer. The potential of being judged as “impulsive” is eliminated.

Over the past two years, we’ve been to RV shows, visited dealerships, called on classified listings and even visited an Airstream rally. We’ve read blogs and forums and interviewed Airstream owners. Choosing the best model and size has been fun and formidable.

I’ve fretted over the wisdom of the expense at this stage of life, and have been haunted by the excess of it, making it a moral dilemma. Do I really have to justify everything?

Finally, for better or worse, we’ve made the decision. We’re gettin’ hitched (as in trailer to pickup). We have a couple of dealers offering us special deals on new trailers that are the model we’ve chosen. That’s the good news.

The other news is that we now face another big decision. We don’t want this one to take two years, so we are asking for your vote. That’s right. Here’s your chance to share your opinion, to help design the interior of a new Airstream. Normally, I wouldn’t throw an important matter like this onto the table of public opinion, but we are very lucky to have a lot of friends who are artists, designers, who have good taste and who know us well enough to help us with this decision.

As you ponder your vote, keep in mind that we really like modern design aesthetic, otherwise we wouldn’t be considering this Airstream model. Oh, and don’t forget this important factor: we have three Grand-Girls, ages 1, 3 and 6, who will be traveling with us from time to time.

There are three choices. Espresso, Oyster, and Salsa.

Espresso

Oyster

Salsa

Here’s how you can vote: You can leave a comment here in the comments section at About Pops. You can also leave your vote as a comment on the post on the About Pops Facebook page. Or you can tweet your vote on Twitter @AboutPops.

Please vote. And, when the Airstream finally arrives, maybe we’ll come stay in your driveway for a week or two.

All Along The Watchtower

The burden of the desert of the sea. As whirlwinds in the south pass through; so it cometh from the desert, from a terrible land. 
A grievous vision is declared unto me; the treacherous dealer dealeth treacherously, and the spoiler spoileth. Go up, O Elam: besiege, O Media; all the sighing thereof have I made to cease. 
Therefore are my loins filled with pain: pangs have taken hold upon me, as the pangs of a woman that travaileth: I was bowed down at the hearing of it; I was dismayed at the seeing of it. 
My heart panted, fearfulness affrighted me: the night of my pleasure hath he turned into fear unto me. 
Prepare the table, watch in the watchtower, eat, drink: arise, ye princes, and anoint the shield. 
For thus hath the Lord said unto me, Go, set a watchman, let him declare what he seeth. — Isaiah 21:1-6 KJV

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According to Amazon.com, the book I pre-ordered months ago is set to be on my doorstep July 14, 2015. I’m like a kid on Christmas morning. The anticipation is higher than in the days leading up to a new season of Downton Abbey.

The book is Go Set A Watchman by Harper Lee. It is a manuscript reportedly written years ago, even before To Kill A Mockingbird, but unpublished until now. I’ve tried not to read too much of the advance speculation about the book, wanting to savor it on my own. But, I do know that it is written in the voice of Scout (probably my all-time favorite literary character) from the story To Kill A Mockingbird (probably my all-time favorite literary work).

If you haven’t read the book, maybe you’ve seen the movie. If not, stop what you’re doing and read it and watch it now. It may be more timely and important today than the day Ms. Lee wrote it.

Speaking of the South, moral dilemmas, justice, judgements, history, politics, traditions, and the like; you know how the adults in the Charlie Brown TV specials talk? Well, I was listening to Neil Young’s “Southern Man” song the other day, you know the one that starts:

Southern man
better keep your head
Don’t forget
what your good book said

For years I had listened to the song and heard this arrangement: Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Verse.

Today I heard it differently. I think it goes (and Neil, if I’m mistaken, give me a call and let’s talk it through):
Chorus, Verse, Verse in a Charlie Brown adult voice
Chorus, Verse, Verse in a Charlie Brown adult voice

I don’t know what the Charlie Brown adult voice is saying, but I’m imagining it is answering Neil’s question at the end of each verse: “How long, how long?”

[DISCLAIMER: It’s not actually a Charlie Brown adult voice. It’s actually a Neil Young guitar solo. But I’m confident he’s playing it as if to say something. But what?]

Maybe the voice is saying… “A grievous vision is declared unto me; the treacherous dealer dealeth treacherously, and the spoiler spoileth… Therefore are my loins filled with pain: pangs have taken hold upon me, as the pangs of a woman that travaileth: I was bowed down at the hearing of it; I was dismayed at the seeing of it… Go, set a watchman!”

Back to Monroeville, Alabama, home of the very reclusive Harper Lee. Big celebrations are planned in town for the release of this new (old) book. Apparently Ms. Lee who lives in an assisted living center in Monroeville is sort of cranky and not expected to make any public appearance whatsoever. 

“Charming second-hand anecdotes about Lee circulate through the town. A HarperCollins employee told the story of how Lee was given a mock-up of the forthcoming book’s cover earlier this year. ‘She (Ms. Lee) looked at it and said, “There should be no comma after the word ‘Go’.” It was then pointed out to her by one of the editors that in the King James Version of Isaiah 21:6 there is a comma.” Lee responded, ‘That’s the Lord’s Book. This is my book. And there is no comma.’ 

“In To Kill A Mockingbird, Scout remarks of a tea party: ‘Ladies in bunches always filled me with vague apprehension and a firm desire to be elsewhere,’ — and the feeling in town is a little like that tea party, according to local Crissy Nettles, ‘Everyone from here who has ever met Miss Lee is sure she won’t be in the public eye.’” (LA Times)

I’m wondering if, in this new book, Scout and Neil Young might meet, maybe in a coffee shop in Monroeville. Neil would say, “Scout, you’re a Watchperson, aren’t you?” And Scout would reply, “I hope so Neil. Atticus certainly was. I hope both of us are.”

By the way, and speaking of coffee shops, there’s a great little place I know of that would be the perfect setting to meet and talk about these two Harper Lee books, once we’ve all read them. Let me know if you would be interested in that.

POPS AND KARLEE PLAYING SOME BACKGAMMON IN A COFFEE JOINT PERFECT FOR A BOOK DISCUSSION

Getting The Band Together

The other day I was looking through a spare closet for something when I ran across a cymbal bag full of Zildjan cymbals. There were rides, crashes, and splashes and a lovely set of hi-hats. Then I tried to remember what I had come to this closet to find, but that train had left the one track of my mind.

I did have this thought: I have cymbals, drumsticks and even a set of drums. I should start a band!

It’s been years since I last played in a band, but other old guys do it (whether they should or not). And with casinos popping up all across our great state, there seem to be a lot of venues wanting musical acts of old, past-their-prime musicians.

If you’ve never started a band, you many not know that the first thing you do is think of a good name. Without a great band name, you might as well leave the cymbals in the closet.

"Pops & The Geezers" has a nice ring, but it eliminates any chance of cross-generational appeal. Remember that band from the early 60s with the visionary name, "Gerry And The Pacemakers"? I bet back when they were recording their big hit, Don’t Let The Sun Catch You Crying, they had no idea their band name would be as relevant in the 60s as it would be for them in their 60s (albeit with a different sort of connotation).

I do like the idea of a “coming of age” sort of theme to the band’s name. In fact, I think it would be cool to have a band made up of kids in their first coming-of-age and more senior members like myself in our second coming-of-age. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

How about "Puberty & Senility"? "The Young Punks & The Old Pharts"? Hmmm, I can’t really picture either of those in the bright lights of the Forked Feathers Casino and Buffet.

There’s actually an app for that. Yes, a website with a band name generator. You give it a key word and it spits out some suggestions for band names. So I entered the word “age” and got these recommendations: 

• Unified Age
• Age Pony
• Timely Age
• Godless Age And The Exiled Groove
• Yard Of Age

No, no, no, no and nope.

Then I found an acronym generator. Here you put in your keyword and…

AGE = Advancing Gravity Era

So much for the help of technology. How about “The Slowly Rolling Stones”? Maybe something edgier: “The Angry Republicans”? Not musical enough. “The Old Spice Guys”?

I need more input, so let’s talk about adding band members and see if they have some ideas. First, I need some really good singers. We must have tight harmonies. How about killing two birds with one stone (not as a band name but as a phrase meaning taking care of more than one matter at a time). There’s that two-sister band called “First Aid Kit”! I love their vocals and seamless harmonies and they obviously are fearless when it comes to naming a band. Heck, throw some Lipitor and Viagra into that first aid kit and it’s multi-generational.

Since the band, “The Civil Wars” broke up (I guess their name was a self-fulfilling prophecy), maybe they’re looking for a new gig. I would take one or both of them.

On guitar: Hendrix is dead (and I don’t feel too good myself). Ha. (Thanks to Lewis Grizzard). James Taylor is timeless and wonderful. You not only get the guitar, but great vocals too. For me the choice for bass is obvious: Esperanza Spalding! And on piano: Diana Krall. Who else? 

I’ve often thought, if there is one jazz pianist I would love to see play live, it would be Diana Krall. But she hardly ever tours in the U.S. so what are the chances. Turns out, chances are 100%! She’s coming to OKC this fall and I already have tickets for My Amazing-Missus and myself. I sure hope "Pops & His Pals" don’t have a gig that night. (Sometimes you have to try a name in a sentence to see how it feels.) (It doesn’t feel right.)

The melody of our first song is already running through my mind. It will be a cover of the Leslie Gore song from the early 60s, but with a twist. Our’s will be “It’s My Party And I’ll Cry And Complain If I Want To.”

Check out this music video of the girls of “First Aid Kit”. They could be the new lead vocalist of “Pops & The Pups” (Not to be confused with “Gladys Knight & The Pips”).